Monday, December 12, 2011

A letter heavy with love..

It feels so silly sometime. Don’t know the letter which has heavily loaded with so much love will reach you or not. If it reached you don’t know you will see it or you consider it or not!

But no regrets. I believe strongly that love itself is giving and not expecting back. Love is enjoying  ‘the giving’.

Did I express the love I have for you anytime? Or its in the dream? But the moment I expressed is a dreamlike situation. A drug dosed moment. Also it’s a failed moment. It is failed because it has never really expressed the amount of love I have for you. Feel like it has able to express only one percent of what I have. Sometime I think to express it completely I need 75 years minimum which I want to spend with you.  Because love is actually a verb, it is actualized only through loving.

Sorry, as love makes a human – a Human, it also does make him philosophical. (unlike Socrates quote in which he says unhappy marriage makes a man philosophical)

Anyway how are you? Hope you are having rocking life as usual.

Me? I’m not ok.

After coming here so far from you I feel God has stolen a part of my soul to create you. Yes, I’m missing you badly. Sorry this is not the same kind of ‘missing’ which is used so often, so mechanically which has no meat or a shallow one by just typing in the mobile while you are enjoying food or enjoying the visuals in front.

You know- this missing someone- is a slow process. It’s like a medicine which is being injected. First few days were fine. Only sometime I would feel that I have lost some part of mine. But after some days it’s deeply spread in to my system; my daily routine. In between the work, in between having lunch, or in between sleep - a wave of pain flows through my mind. Or a bird of nothingness without wings flies right through my heart piercing it. It is pain you will not feel like crying. This is in which you will suddenly become silent and think wish you are here, right now.   

Now I’m experiencing a real missing pain.

P.S.: We can turn the pain of missing someone to the inspiring one. Trying to learn it.